A Man's World

Smack The Pony

2006-08-24T09:39:00.000-04:00

G-String Show Off - video powered by Metacafe

A Little Hairy?

2006-08-23T16:49:00.000-04:00

There's nothing wrong with being hairy, it's caused by testosterone. But if you insist on going out in public without a shirt on I suggest you check this out: Philips Body Shave

It's called personal grooming.

Try it you might like it.

I'm here to help a brother out!

Craft Day

2006-08-17T18:55:00.000-04:00

Kids hanging around bored? Are they getting in your way and under your skin? You're better half is out?
Sounds like a perfect time for crafts!
Dig out your wifes/girlfriends/life partners feminine hygiene products, sit the kids down and make a Tampon Blowgun.
Hours of fun.

French Kissing Lessons

2006-08-14T17:16:00.000-04:00

WOOHOO:)

How Scary Are You

2006-08-01T15:55:00.000-04:00

You Are Scary

You even scare scary people sometimes!

How Scary Are You?

How Many Kinds Of Willies?

2006-07-22T10:26:00.000-04:00

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many
kinds of boobies are there?
The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there's three kinds of breasts.
In her twenties, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her
thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.
After fifty, they are like onions."
"Onions?"
"Yes, you see them and they make you cry."
This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mom, how many
kinds of 'willies' are there?"
The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through
three phases. In his twenties, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and
hard. In his thirties and forties, it is a birch, flexible but reliable.
After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree."
"A Christmas tree?"
"Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only."

Hey Daejin....Bite Me!

2006-07-08T14:15:00.000-04:00

Showbiz Newsy News #20 by Zipperfish.com(NSFW)

2006-05-02T11:47:00.000-04:00

The F Word (NSFW)

2006-05-02T11:43:00.000-04:00

Hahaha! If you're into World Of Warcraft here's the link for the WOW version

Beerbelly is a big success

2006-04-25T22:34:00.000-04:00

The Beerbelly - a secret strap-on beer holder that disguises itself as a bulging beer belly - is being marketed in the US.
It was the brainchild of three middle-aged men who wanted a way of sneaking beer into movies and baseball games.
Within just five days of launching their www.thebeerbelly.com website, they had an incredible two million hits and calls for it to be sold worldwide.
The £20 Beerbelly's harnesses slip over the shoulders and around the waist, under a shirt, leaving onlookers thinking the wearer just spends too much time in the pub.
But little do they know, the wearer doesn't actually need the pub - he, or she, has an 80-ounce plastic bladder full of beer constantly at hand.
(via)

Awww, so cute.......not!

2006-04-25T22:19:00.000-04:00

Suck It In Tubby

2006-04-20T21:49:00.000-04:00

The Vagina, And All The Mysteries That Entails

2006-04-20T21:35:00.000-04:00

Gentlemen, few things have mystified men as much as the vagina. You hear words like clitoris, vulva, g-spot and pelvic inflammatory disease. Guys, BDF is here to help you. Believe us, the cooch is no big deal.
The vagina is known by myriad colorful and imaginative names: vertical axe wound, veege, junkbox, pie, poozle, cooze, pooze, pussy, box o' wonder, cockpit, the squish, the pink, fuck hole, tuna factory, etc. But we digress.
As intimidating as this vessel of goodness may seem to the casual observer, to the journeyman its secrets are many and relatively untold.
The female orgasm? Yeah...that's not real.
G-Spot? Total bullshit.
We here at BDF can, however, tell you a few little known secrets about the vagina.
For instance, did you know that in a pinch, the warmth of the vagina can be used to heat your tea? It's true. Nasty...but true.
(more)

Sugar, We're Going Down by Fallout Boy - Parodies

2006-04-20T16:58:00.000-04:00

I love this song......I love it even more after seeing these parodies.

Here's some more:

Emo sucks

Not quite as good

Thanks to Doug for this idea.

2006-04-19T16:56:00.000-04:00

2006-04-19T16:55:00.000-04:00

hehehe

The Stripper Pole

2006-04-19T16:14:00.000-04:00

Gives you the best possible workout.

Cameos by: David (Gruber) Allen, Sarah Silverman, Samm Levine, Kris McGaha and Fred Stoller

Strip Poker(NSFW)

2006-04-19T16:02:00.000-04:00

Here's a little game of strip poker. Check it out!

For All The Liars.......And German Tourists

2006-04-19T15:36:00.000-04:00

Men’s Sexy Stretch Thong Underwear Pouch.

Size: 36″-46″ inch waist.

100% Polyester

For sale on ebay

wtf

Women Bank On Divorce

2006-04-19T15:28:00.000-04:00

You could call it dash cash. A survey has revealed that thousands more wives than husbands are putting away money in preparation for divorce.
When asked which "life milestones" they were preparing for financially, 3 per cent of women answered divorce compared with 1 per cent of men.
"For some people who are unhappy and thinking ahead and planning to leave their relationship at some point, that is part of the preparations they might be making," she said. (more)

Moral of the story: PRENUP. PRENUP, PRENUP

Get Firefox

2006-04-18T10:19:00.000-04:00

The Men Commandments

2006-04-18T10:15:00.000-04:00

Argument with these rules instantly revokes your identity as a man. You’re no longer a man and you’re out of the man club.

1.)It is ok for a Man to cry under the following circumstances:

- When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
- The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
- After wrecking your boss' car.
- One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".
- When she is using her teeth.

MORE

Is A Donkey Better Than A Housewife?

2006-04-18T10:10:00.000-04:00

According to a school textbook in India they are!

A new school textbook in India has kicked up a storm by comparing housewives to donkeys - and saying donkeys make better companions.
The new book has been written for 14-year-old schoolchildren in the western state of Rajasthan.
Part of the book says: "A donkey is like a housewife.
"In fact, the donkey is a shade better, for while the housewife may sometimes complain and walk off to her parents' home, you'll never catch the donkey being disloyal to his master."
The book was approved by the state's Hindu nationalist Bharatiya Janata Party government but has sparked complaints from its women's wing.
State education officials in Rajasthan, which is known for its conservative attitude to women, said people should not be upset at the comparison.
Education official AR Khan said: "The comparison was made in good humour."
But he added: "Protests have been taken note of and the board is in the process of removing the reference." (via)

Beware Of The Homosexual

2006-04-16T10:11:00.000-04:00

"One never knows when the homosexual is about."

Hahaha! Can't.....stop.....laughing!

Samurai Kittens

2006-04-16T10:02:00.000-04:00

Now this is my type of game! The basic premise of Samurai Kittens is....yup, you guessed it, to kill kittens. WOOHOO!

The Ultimate Video Game Quiz Challenge: Atari

2006-04-16T09:53:00.000-04:00

What Is Victoria's Secret?

2006-04-15T00:38:00.000-04:00

Just a few....

2006-04-15T00:20:00.000-04:00

Need a new girlfriend?

Alphabet Girls The Lynx ladies will write a message for you

And finally, just in time for Easter, Verbally Abusive Jesus

Best of Craiglist

2006-04-12T10:18:00.000-04:00

Some years have passed, so I can talk about this now.
Many many moons ago, I started dating this very cool girl. We hit it off right away, had lots in common, she was smart, agressive, cool and funny. And hot. Really hot.
So we dated for a while, which became a year, then nearly two. I figured she was it. We worked together on decisions, but I followed my passions and she followed hers - both career professionals, both creative, and both ready to kick this town for a Carribean cottage if the thought ever struck us. Adventure. Romance. Lots of Sex. All was right with my world.
So I did what I figured I should do - I went out shopping for a diamond ring.
That was the biggest mistake I ever made.
I can't really put my finger on the exact change, but over the years, I've cometo summarize it this way: I went from being the guy she loved and wanted to marry to the guy who didn't match up with her fantasy about getting married, in about 24 hours.
She started acting as if I was completely incapable of making any decisons on my own, in spite of the evidence to the contrary. She criticized everything I did. She tried to make me look like some idiot, Homer Simpson type. Now, I'm not splitting atoms in the basement or anything, but I was Fulbright kid for a year and graduated cum laude, and I have a tendency to avoid dumb shit like telemarking scams, computer viruses, STD's and, well, white slavery rings. Let's just say I'm no Homer.
Then the wedding planning started, and HO LEE SHIT. We were doing alright, for sure, but she had put together about a 45K day for us in a matter of a week or two. When I objected to some ridiculous expense (bunting? WTF?), I was told I was wrong, or "didn't know what I was talking about" and, unless I wanted a big fight, I shut up right there. Trust me, when I balked at the cost of flowers, I was nearly decapitated.
Nearly all of this, I was told, was "What she always wanted".
Well, I always wanted 15 playboy bunnies oiled up on a water bed in the horniest state known to womankind, which I think might have actually cost LESS, but I was pretty sure it wasn't going to happen.
I hit the ceiling when I saw the guestlist. 225. I barely know 225 people, let alone want to feed them and watch them get drunk while my savings account cries to me over the phone "You have ZERO dollars and 22 cents". Who is this? That? A bartender you know? I don't even LIKE that girl!
One night, I told her this: You know what, you're going to have about as much fun, possibly more, if I don't show up at this thing.
She laughed.
So I bailed. Yup, I packed my shit and hit the door, a good 4 months prior to the date of my pre-planned, ever-priced, heavily adorned demise. I called it off, packed my shit and left. And I have never looked back.
Oh, we had a big talk. It was about as much fun as you'd expect. I got my hair blown back for an hour or so, but I was already numb. She'd been yelling at me about this and that for so long, I couldn't tell anymore when she was mad or not.
Maybe the hardest part was that I was having incredible sucess, in lots of things, while all this was happening. Musically, professionaly - things were really coming together for me. And she couldn't be pleased. In the end, it's her loss, but I've always wondered what the fuck she was thinking.
The moral to this story?
Engagement Ring - $3800.00 (never got it back)
Non-Refundable Deposits - $5200.00 (all my money)
Moving Expenses - $750.00
Being Single again - Priceless.(via)

Thanks to Doug for this!

End Womens Suffrage

2006-04-11T15:48:00.000-04:00

Some dude goes around Padua Academy, which is a National School Of Excellence. A title given to them by the US Department Of Education. Hilarious stuff.

Suffrage=The right or privilege of voting; franchise.

This Is The Best Video EVER!

2006-04-09T21:54:00.000-04:00

Revenge is a dish best served cold

For The Ladies

2006-04-09T11:08:00.000-04:00

The Cleaning Hunk

You Sexy Thang!

2006-04-09T10:49:00.000-04:00

Evolution

2006-04-07T11:05:00.000-04:00

Fore!

2006-04-07T10:47:00.000-04:00

Birthing coach: "All you mommies-to-be should know that walking while you’re pregnant is very beneficial. And you husbands, it wouldn’t hurt you to take the time to go walking with your partners."
One husband: "Is it OK if she carries a golf bag?"

Mother In Law For Sale

2006-04-07T10:40:00.000-04:00

A man is so sick of his mother-in-law he is selling her on eBay.
Steve Owen, 42, published a photo of 50-year-old Caroline Allen under "Collectables And Weird Stuff" on the internet auction site - describing her as "used".
He has invited bids starting at just £1 reports The Sun.
He posted the ad on the site after Caroline quit her home of 27 years in America and bought a house round the corner from him and common-law wife Tracey, 35, in Alvaston, Derby.
Steve said: "I'm deadly serious. She comes to the house every day trying to change me and make me tidy.
"I just hope someone will take her off my hands. She's single and not bad looking."
Caroline hit back: "He's lazy and I won't stop nagging him until he changes - that's my job. But he could have made the starting bid £100. I look better in the flesh."(via)

One Click for One Flirt

2006-04-05T23:16:00.000-04:00

In this commercial Ben walks the streets and clicks (on his little clicker graciously provided by AXE) every time he encounters a beautiful women who seems to like him ... unfortunately for the poor Ben the last encounter is an other man in an elevator who has much more clicks then Ben

Check out clickmore too

Jessica

2006-04-05T19:31:00.000-04:00

WOOHOO! Jessica at MaximOnline. Check it out here.

Man Tried To Sell His Soul Online

2006-04-05T11:28:00.000-04:00

A Chinese man tried to sell his soul on an internet auction site.
The man, in his late 20s, from Jiaxing, near Shanghai, attempted to sell his soul on Taobao, China's top online auction site.
He attracted bids from some 58 potential buyers before the posting was pulled, reports China Daily.
"We reviewed Taobao's policies and realised we had no specific policy on the selling of souls," said Porter Erisman, spokesman for Taobao's parent company, Alibaba.com.
Mr Erisman said Taobao wasn't opposed to the idea of soul selling online, but wanted more proof that the seller could provide the goods.
"After some discussion, we decided that we will allow the member to sell his soul on Taobao, but only if he can provide written permission from a 'higher authority'," he said.(via)

Savage Love

2006-04-05T10:59:00.000-04:00

March 29th, 2006

By Dan Savage
I am a 17-year-old straight girl with a boy problem—and as such I am fairly sure it won't be terribly interesting to read, and will thus avoid publication, but I figured it would be worth a try.
I've known this boy for three years. A year ago, he asked me out but wanted me to keep the whole thing secret. We had the prototypical movie-theater-back-row kissing extravaganzas. Alas, we eventually split. I spent months crying and sulking, openly loathing the prick. Eventually I gave up hating him, and soon after, we "hooked up," as the youths call it these days.
During a fateful conversation shortly thereafter, he informed me that I was no more than an easy, alcoholic "no big deal." This resulted in yet another period of sulking and crying. I confronted him. Soon we were at it again and I was feeling sluttish about my inability to have a platonic relationship with a straight boy. His response: "Just because two people have amazing sex doesn't mean they're not real friends." Since that conversation, we've gotten together a few times, but never as friends. I never thought of myself as someone shallow enough to go through all this just because he's good in bed—Christ, is he!—but I suppose that's really beside the point. Anyway, my questions:
1. Is it actually possible for two people to have both friendship and sex?
2. Will anything more come from this? Is there any chance at an actual relationship?

Just Another Silly Girl

1. Yes, absolutely—and I speak from experience. (Hey there, Mike.)
2. Nothing will come of this, JASG. Sorry.
Let me clue you and other youths in on something that ought to be covered in sex-ed but isn't. (Nothing useful ever is.) Some people seek out sex partners for whom they feel nothing, or worse yet, for whom they feel nothing but contempt. Why? Because some people are insecure assholes, JASG. Since it's impossible to have sex with someone without making yourself vulnerable, and since the more attracted you are to someone, the more vulnerable you have to make yourself, insecure assholes will sleep with people they don't care about. Being rejected by someone you actually like and/or being exposed as a bumbling beginner is scary, so insecure assholes avoid the emotional risk by seeking out, say, an easily manipulated person with low self-esteem.
The mistake you've made, JASG, is assuming that this guy must like you because he wants to fuck you. While that's often the case, it's not always the case, and this boy's desire to keep your relationship secret was a red flag. Now that you know he's been using you, JASG, you have a choice to make. You can go back to loathing the prick, and that's probably what most people would advise you to do. But if you're digging the amazing sex, and you can accept that nothing more will ever come of this relationship, hey, why not use him right back?(more)

*sigh* Why are girls soooooo dumb?
Also check out Impeach The Mother Fucker Already

Links, Links and More Links

2006-04-04T11:01:00.000-04:00

The Big Nose Appreciation Page

Shakira mmmm Shakira

100 Best Bodies (via)

How To Be A Cyber-Lova Just for Stringbean;)

Case Mod for Men

Case Mod for Women

Too Much Information I can't hear you, lalalalalalala

How To Become A Stripper

PMS Guidelines for Men

Manboobs

Is She Cheating?

Top 100 Chuck Norris Facts

Fly Guy Game

Naked Guy Basketball too funny

2006-04-04T10:15:00.000-04:00

hehe

Happy Birthday Mary

2006-04-03T23:20:00.000-04:00

Long live the Queen

Family Guy - Milkshake

2006-04-03T23:07:00.000-04:00

Thanks to Doug at Geekzone for this!

NSFW : Guy Sets Pubes On Fire

2006-04-03T22:39:00.000-04:00

Check out this dumbass here.(via)

Adicolor

2006-04-02T11:47:00.000-04:00

Daejin put it best:

"I don't know whether it's a viral for whack a mole, addidas or latex.I do know it features Jenna Jameson..."

Thanks dude!

Boobs, Butt or Shoulder!

2006-04-01T13:36:00.000-05:00

Red vs Blue : Real Life vs Internet

2006-04-01T13:25:00.000-05:00

2006-04-01T12:25:00.000-05:00

A guy was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked up behind him and whacked him on the head with a frying pan.
“What the hell was that for?” he asked.
“That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Mary Lou written on it,” she replied.
“But you don’t understand,” he pleaded. “Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Mary Lou was the name of one of the horses I bet on.”
“Oh honey, I’m sorry,” she said. “I should have known there was a good explanation.”
Three days later he was watching a ball game on TV when she walked up and hit him in the head again, this time with the iron skillet, which knocked him out cold. When he came to, he asked, “What was that for?” he begged.
“Your horse called!”

What If Google Owned Everything?

2006-03-31T23:18:00.000-05:00

Check it out here at b3ta

April Fools Day

2006-03-31T23:07:00.000-05:00

Here's a playful little one for you to insert in your
victim's computer, that won't harm anyone but will definitely
arouse alarm. Go into TOOLS, then select AUTOCORRECT. In
REPLACE, type in an innocent, common word, like "please".
Then in the WITH box, type in something cute, like "please
kiss my ass and", or "please avoid this virus like the plague,
but". Then every time the victim goes to type a business letter,
intending to type something like "please refer to our letter
of blah blah" instead he/she gets "please kiss my ass and refer
to our letter of". More subtly, you could put in something
like a misspelling: "pleez", for instance. Like you're kompyutr's
gittin illitarit. An experienced Mickeysoft Word user will
recognize this trick and be able to fix it, after the initial
giggle (and shock). A less experienced victim will need a tip
or two.
Another devilish trick is to select FORMAT, then FONT,
then COLOR, and choose WHITE. Then click DEFAULT and YES. No
matter what the victim types, it won't come up on the screen.
But of course there is a cursor (he/she curses); this one
might even stop some of the IT types for awhile, as Nerdthink
doesn't necessarily include such deviousness.
You could also change their default font to something
like DaOth or Wingdings. Or keep the default font but set it
for 96pt. I trust you get the idea.

also check out these:
The Office PSA's
Guns N' Roses-Chinese Democracy

New Skin For Your Ipod

2006-03-31T22:55:00.000-05:00

Although I was horrified by Goatse, the igoatse is hillarious!(more)

PREGNANCY Q&A & MORE!

2006-03-31T11:21:00.000-05:00

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will the baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth

Q: My wife is 5 months pregnant & so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?

Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.

Dueling Banjos

2006-03-30T12:42:00.000-05:00

YEEHAW!

2006-03-30T12:20:00.000-05:00

(via)

Heat Vision and Jack

2006-03-30T12:14:00.000-05:00

Heat Vision and Jack was created as a 1999 pilot for Fox. Written by Dan Harmon and Rob Schrab, directed by Ben Stiller, this series was passed over by Fox despite critical acclaim from those who've been lucky enough to see it.The 30 minute pilot is about an astronaut (played by Jack Black) with a medical secret who is on the run from the evil Ron Silver and the rest of NASA, with the help of a talking motorcycle called Heat Vision (voiced by Owen Wilson).

Cool Game

2006-03-30T12:00:00.000-05:00

Fancy Pants Adventure is a really cool game from Hallpass.

You should check it out!

Listen To Sharon

2006-03-30T11:30:00.000-05:00

Sharon Stone is telling randy teenagers to have oral sex instead of giving up their virginity.
The Aids campaigning actress - who appears fully nude in new film, 'Basic Instinct 2' - says it's safer than going all the way without protection.
She said: "Young people talk to me about what to do if they're being pressed for sex. I tell them what I believe, oral sex is a hundred times safer than vaginal or anal sex. If you're in a situation where you cannot get out of sex, offer something else." (more)

That's What She Gets For Not Carrying Her Own Damn Purse

2006-03-30T11:15:00.000-05:00

A Canadian man lost his wife's designer purse - containing $1,000,000 worth of jewellery - on holiday in California.
But a local man found the purse where he left it, on a park bench, and handed it in to police, reports the San Francisco Chronicle.
Shahla Ghannadian cried for most of the way home to Toronto after husband Said Khalili lost the purse in Sausalito.
The designer purse contained her Cartier watch, diamond and ruby rings, pearl earrings, necklaces with large diamond stones and $500 cash. In total, it was worth $1 million, the equivalent of £575,000. (more)

Are You An Obsessive Girlfriend?

2006-03-29T10:53:00.000-05:00

Women become attached emotionally, some very quickly, and assume that the man shares these same feelings and desires. However, this can be a sure fire way to push the "man of your dreams" out of your life.

How not to be an obsessive girlfriend

2006-03-29T10:45:00.000-05:00

Pervert!

If Only It Was This Easy

2006-03-29T10:41:00.000-05:00

An Indian Muslim man has reportedly been ordered to separate from his wife after saying 'I divorce thee' in his sleep.
Aftab Ansari was told to leave Sohela, his wife of 11 years, after he said ‘talaq’ - the Arabic equivalent of 'I divorce thee' - three times while asleep.
Religious scholars in Jalpaiguri, West Bengal, told the couple to obey orders or face social boycott, reports Asian News International.
The couple were told the only alternative under Muslim law was a temporary separation of 100 days during which the wife would stay at her father’s house and spend a night with another man who she must marry.
Sohela could then remarry Aftab after obtaining a divorce from her second husband.
But the mother of three has threatened to commit suicide if forced to marry someone else: “I love him and I don’t want to leave him in any case," she said.
But Aftab said: “I think what my society is doing is also not wrong. I think they are doing what they think is right.” (via)

Who's Gonna Win?

2006-03-27T22:35:00.000-05:00

2006-03-27T22:19:00.000-05:00

The man approached a very beautiful woman in a large supermarket and asked "You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"
Woman: "Why?"
Man: "Because every time I talk to a a beautiful woman, my wife appears out of nowhere."

Man blames crash on pretty woman

2006-03-27T22:08:00.000-05:00

A German taking a Ferrari for a test drive wrapped it round a lamppost when he tried to impress a pretty woman.
Alphons Edberg, 33, from Hamburg, was driving a borrowed Ferrari 360 Modena which he was considering buying.
But, according to police, the inexperienced driver lost control after putting his foot down to impress a pretty woman he had spotted.
He crashed the powerful car into a tree, a road sign and a fence before finally wrapping it around a lamppost.
The car was a write off and Edberg is in hospital being treated for head injuries. (via)

Concentration Test For Men (NSFW)

2006-03-27T21:58:00.000-05:00

Thanks to my brother for this:
See if you can follow the little red ball!

2006-03-26T15:36:00.000-05:00

Who's Got A Dirty Mind?

2006-03-26T15:12:00.000-05:00

Glow In The Dark Condom Commercial

2006-03-24T13:43:00.000-05:00

World's First Beer Health Spa

2006-03-24T13:34:00.000-05:00

The world's first beer health centre has opened in the cellar of a family brewery in the Czech Republic.

Beer baths, beer massages and beer cosmetics are on offer at the spa at the Chodovar Family brewery in Chodova Plana.

The converted cellars include seven huge Victorian style baths where guests can swim in beer while enjoying a pint poured at a bathside bar.

Guests on £80 weekend packages can indulge in a range of health treatments including beer wraps, starting at £12 per session.

Owner Jiri Plevka said: "Beer can treat a range of conditions, particularly skin conditions, and the health centre should appeal to men who are put off by 'posh' traditional spas.

"I have heard of some places in other countries where people can swim in beer but it's just a gimmick.

"We believe in the healing properties of beer and we offer the full range of treatments. We are a fully-fledged beer spa." (via)

2006-03-24T13:23:00.000-05:00

After the party, as the couple was driving home, the woman asks her husband, "Honey, has anyone ever told you how handsome, sexy and irresistible to women you are?"
The flattered husband said, "No, dear they haven't."
The wife yells, "Then what the heck gave you that idea at the party tonight?"

Press Pause To Stop The Music

2006-03-24T13:21:00.000-05:00

Nations Of the World By Yakko

2006-03-23T16:02:00.000-05:00

Just a little help for those who think that Australia is France, Korea, etc.

Australian Newscaster asks Americans Which Country to Invade Next (language NSFW)

2006-03-23T15:48:00.000-05:00

Airtoons

2006-03-23T10:32:00.000-05:00

Parodied airline safety cards! During my college days back in '99 I was on a flight somewhere when I realized that the safety instructions in front of me had no captions. I thought to myself, "why is that guy's life jacket dispensing red licorice?!" So I decided to add some captions to the emergency evacuation instruction placards that everyone who flies the friendly skies is familiar with. I showed them to my pals, and they suggested that I build a site housing the silly plane crash pictures. So I did!
Check it out here.(via)

National Lampoon Flashback

2006-03-23T10:28:00.000-05:00

....as for you boys, don't feel left out. If you glance down between your legs, where your vagina should be, you will see an odd-looking pink sac containing two little ugly things. Go ahead, take a look right now, but keep your hands on the book (more about that later). Quite a surprise, wasn't it? Well, the funny pink sac is called your "scrotum" (skro tum), and the two little ugly things are called "testes" (teh stees) and are why you can never know the ultimate, inexpressible joy of motherhood.
Believe it or not, your scrotum will respond to sudden changes in temperature, quickly raising or lowering your testes to maintain them at a constant heat level, something seen nowhere else in nature except by those few who, have mastered the proper techniques of marshmallow toasting. If you don't believe me, try rubbing an ice cube against your scrotum and see what happens. Now, quickly try a lighted match. Now another ice cube. Another match. Faster. Cube. Match. Cube. Ma --- aha! Didn't your mother ever tell you not to play with matches? All joking aside, this is simply another example of the wonders you can find in and around your own body, stuff that has often led to many important scientific discoveries. For example, when my husband, Ronald, was in the Boy Scouts, he used this same natural principle for a homemade thermometer and won a merit badge in meteorology.(more)

Mothers Against Peeing Standing Up

2006-03-22T21:39:00.000-05:00

MYTH #2: "It's a victimless crime."
Fact: Peeing standing up destroys families. Who cleans the bathrooms in your house? Your mother? Your wife? Even if you clean up after yourself, what happens when you are a guest at someone's home, over at your friend's house, visiting the inlaws, or using a public bathroom? Why should someone else have to suffer for your unwillingness to sit down?

Visit MAPSU.

2006-03-22T21:19:00.000-05:00

One evening wife drew her husband's attention to the couple next door and said, "Do you see that couple? How devoted they are? He kisses her every time they meet. Why don't you do that?"
"I would love to," replied the husband, "but I don't know her well enough."

Blame Canada

2006-03-22T12:20:00.000-05:00

2006-03-22T11:43:00.000-05:00

Becky was on her deathbed, with her husband Jake at her side.
He held her cold hand and tears silently streamed down his face.
Her pale lips moved. "Jake" she said.
"Hush, " he quickly interrupted, "don 't talk. "
But she insisted, " Jake, " she said in her tired voice, " I have to talk. I must confess."
" There is nothing to confess" said the weeping Jake, "It' s all right. Everything' s all right."
"No, no. I must die in peace. I must confess, Jake, that I have been unfaithful to you. "
Jake stroked her hand. " Now, Becky, don' t be concern, I know all about it'" , he sobbed. "Why else would I poison you?? "

A Reason To Teach Your Kids To Clean Their Rooms:

2006-03-22T11:41:00.000-05:00

Mexican soldiers shot dead for not cleaning up

A Mexican soldier shot dead two subordinates for refusing an order to clean up their base on the country's Caribbean coast, a police spokesman said on Monday.

Alonso German was taken into military custody after shooting the two on Friday night at the army base near the resort of Cancun, said local police spokesman Angel Lopez.

He said he did not know what ranks the soldiers held. Officers at the base referred inquiries to Mexico's Defense Ministry, where no one was immediately available for comment. (via)

2006-03-21T19:48:00.000-05:00

There were three guys talking in the pub. Two of them are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while the third remains quiet.
After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says, "Well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?"
The third fellow says "I'll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees."
The first two guys were amazed. "What happened then?" they asked.
"She said, 'get out from under the bed and fight like a man'."

Showbiz Newsy News #15

2006-03-20T11:26:00.000-05:00

2006-03-17T23:00:00.000-05:00

hehehe

Shobiz Newsy News by Zipperfish.com

2006-03-17T13:02:00.000-05:00

What's Her Bra Size?

2006-03-17T12:58:00.000-05:00

Rajeed The Rednosed Reindeer

2006-03-16T13:16:00.000-05:00

Who Says Porn Is Fake

2006-03-16T12:56:00.000-05:00

Prostitutes in Germany are being given the chance to retrain as geriatric nurses.
About 30 prostitutes, aged 20 to 40, are to take up a two-year training course for auxiliary nurses in North Rhine Westphalia, reports the Telegraph.
The scheme, funded by the church and the EU, is aimed at easing a chronic shortfall in nurses as well as offering an alternative to prostitutes.
One trainee, Angelika, who is in her late 30s and worked in Bochum as a prostitute for six years said she had found the transition very smooth: "I'm feeling good," she said.
Rita Kühn, of the protestant church's welfare programme, said: "They are in general very good at dealing with people, in addition to which they don't get squeamish and have absolutely no fear about touching or being touched."

2006-03-16T12:27:00.000-05:00

EEEEEEK!

Coyote Love (NSFW)

2006-03-16T12:20:00.000-05:00

Be careful who you go to bed with!

Best Leafs Jersey Ever

2006-03-16T12:07:00.000-05:00

Thanks Mary ;)

Animalarm

2006-03-10T01:57:00.000-05:00

An exciting new range of Animalarm™ alarm clocks from neOnbubble Biotoxin Delivery & Clocks Division? I just couldn't live without my Silver Tabby Cat model. It's currently set to "Surprise Me!" which means my mornings start with something excitingly random.(more)

Hahaha

Geek Speak

2006-03-09T18:21:00.000-05:00

Online-gaming talk has evolved into a series of emoticons and acronyms, a self-imposed filtering system to separate geeks from the rest of the world. But if you try using these terms in the real world, you can say bye to any chance of bagging a chick.OMFG! J00 NOOB! ROFLMAO!“Oh, my fucking God! You newbie! Rolling on the floor laughing my ass off!” It won’t be so funny if you pull that one out during oral sex.(more)

Welcome

2006-03-09T17:56:00.000-05:00

Las Vegas Sign Generator

From The Window To The Wall

2006-03-09T17:36:00.000-05:00

LIL' Jon is taking the plunge into porn. Like his rap elders Snoop Dogg and Ice T before him, the metal-mouthed "King of Crunk" is starring in his own XXX-rated DVD, "Lil' Jon's Vivid Vegas Party." While Jon does not have sex on camera, he wrote the bass-heavy score and pops up throughout the flesh flick during intimate scenes - at one point exclaiming, "I love my job!" The Sin City smutfest - the first of two the platinum-selling rapper will appear in for adult industry giant Vivid - was "directed" by Jon's grateful buddies C-Mizzle and Shy Dawg. (via)

Just what I want to see in a porn, is seeing Lil Jons ugly mug constantly popping up in the middle of scenes saying "whaaaaat!"

Wal-Mart In Court Fight Over 'Wal-ocaust' T-Shirts

2006-03-09T17:29:00.000-05:00

A Georgia man has filed a lawsuit against Wal-Mart in federal district court in Atlanta in a fight over his T-shirts that compare the retailer's business practices to the Holocaust.
Charles Smith has been marketing shirts that read, "I (heart) Wal-ocaust" T-shirts. Wal-Mart filed a cease-and-desist order in an attempt to make him stop printing the shirts.
The company said Smith is engaging in trademark infringement. It has threatened to sue Smith if he continues to display the logos on his Web site and to print them on his products.

Peta Babes Strike Again!

2006-03-09T16:26:00.000-05:00

New York — Confined to a cage with her nude body painted like a tiger and a banner above her reading, "Wild Animals Don’t Belong Behind Bars," PETA member Amy Jannette will protest the use of exotic animals by the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus. The protest will highlight the dangers that animal acts pose to humans and animals alike:
Date: Thursday, March 9Time: 12 noonPlace: Times Square, Broadway and 46th

So Where The Bloody Hell Are You?

2006-03-09T15:57:00.000-05:00

The country that gave the world such risque comic acts as Benny Hill, the Two Ronnies and Little Britain has banned Australia's new "bloody hell" tourism ads from television because they are too rude.
Australian Tourism Minister Fran Bailey said Britain had banned the television ads, which end with a bikini-clad woman on a beach asking "so where the bloody hell are you?", although the ads would still screen in cinemas and appear in print.

(more)

2006-03-09T11:14:00.000-05:00

hehehe

5 Ways For Girls To Leave Their Lover

2006-03-09T11:07:00.000-05:00

1) Say you're calling for take out-Ask him what he likes on his pizza then order salads.

2) When you're driving with him somewhere and a song comes on the radio that you KNOW he loves, immediately turn it down as low as it can go and ask him "So honey, how was your day?" and get mad if he doesn't ask about yours before turning the song back up.

3) Make him a mix tape. (Must have singles: *Build me up Buttercup*, *Happy Together*, Shania Twain's *From this Moment*, anything by Air Supply, Journey, Barry Manilow and of course Savage Garden's *TrulyMadlyDeeply*. Make sure he listens to it a lot.

4) When he's watching the game on tv, sit on the couch right next to him talking really loud on the phone to your friend. If he asks you to go in the other room just give him *the look*.

5) Make him take you out dancing. Eighties night is a favorite. Whip it. Whip it good. If there's a Village People Cover band in town....call it a date.